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Open Media Conference - round 1

 Tennis -- Discuss Tennis
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Author: Mr Small 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 3:23:24 PM
Subject: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Media: "How do you feel about your first round opponent?"
Small: "I'm not too sure I want to play anyone that gives Sheeps----!"

Media: "It's not against the law ..."
Small: "It is against the law, actually. It is a criminal offence; he should be in prison."

Media: " ...but with regards to the Open."
Small: "Well, no, but SK can't make rules regarding every pecadillo and offensive action that occurs."

Media: "You lost the second round at the last Open to Dartagnan."
Small: "Yes."

Media: "Were you surprised that Dartagnan was found to be using Nandrolone?"
Small: "No, not at all. When Dartagnan beat Tontonan in the first round, Tontonan was extremely suspicious and I concurred with his suspicions. Dartagnan's a cheat. He shouldn't be allowed to play in his own backyard, let alone an Open."

Media: "Are you worried about what could be inside your next opponent?"
Small: "I don't know what's inside Sheepshead. I don't want to know what's inside Sheepshead."

Media: "How do you think the match will go?"
Small: "I'm not sure of that but I am sure of one thing."

Media: "What's that?"
Small: "Win or lose, I won't be shaking his filthy hand. I don't want the guy anywhere near me."




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Author: OliverFan 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 3:52:42 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Media: How do you rate you opponent OF?
OF: Whats his name again?

Media: Slackmac
OF: I DONT!

OLI

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Author: Racing_Dinosaur 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 4:09:48 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
R.D:"is it true mr small that you once grabbed a dog by his hind legs and moved him around like a wheelbarrow?"

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Author: slackmac 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 4:33:49 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Media: "There's been a lot of talk about your opponent's off-field behaviour during the week. Has that distracted you from your preparation?"

Me: "Well, the home video and the nude photos certainly got a lot of attention, but at the end of the day, what happened between Oli and Harold off Neighbours is nobody's business but their own"    

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Author: slackmac 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 5:17:00 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Oli

You may think you've got me with that little thrust, but in fact I replied with a withering riposte some time ago. Unfortunately, it seems to have run afoul of the censors

What sort of society are we living in when you can't make baseless accusations about a bloke on a racing site and a certain well-known Australian character actor?

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Author: Mr Small 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 8:43:33 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Worse baseless, low-brow humour than mine, Slackmac? lol

Send it to my inbox - please.

RD, I love animals and I get your point but I have an image to uphold at these press conferences. lol

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Author: Speedy Gonzalez 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 9:22:49 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
and hypefield reckons my joke was no good - that was a waste of time.
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Author: the mookstas no 1 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 9:34:51 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Media- Relative newcomer first up Mookie. How do you think you will fare?

Mookie- To start, I'm going to enschwoud him in a cocoon of howwor. Absowoo howwor. I intend on swow, demowawising embawassmen. I will squeeze his head untiw a swimy ooze comes out of his eyebaws.

Media- They're some fighting words Mike.. ah Mook. Any concerns on being a rookie challenger?

Mook- Wookie? You tink I'm a wookie chawwenger? I been wound da bwock, wet me tew you. I'm gonna wumble, I'm gonna dance, and weave my impwint on dis man's head. I want to eat his chiwdwen. If i get hungwy, i might have a bite of him, I'm mad baby.

Media- Right.. moving on, have you seen much of your opponent, Sfewst?

Mook- Im gonna tew you, I don't care, I'm so pwetty, I'm gonna dance. I never seen, i never herd nuttin, he is nobody to me. I can't even say his name. Im cwazy man, I'm cwazy.

Media- Well good luck anyway Mike

Mook- What did you call me? I'm not Mike any more, I'm iwon mook, and im cwazy.

Media- ...Yes. Sorry, Mook, and good luck

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Author: OliverFan 
Timestamp:- 27/1/2004 9:48:39 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Nice try mate but you were beaten convincingly in the sledge and not even a protest could get you to no1.

OLI


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Author: Sheeps head 
Timestamp:- 28/1/2004 7:24:00 AM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
LOL Gladstone! You think my hand is filthy, wait til you smell my breathe.
Hope you don't mind but before I serve I have this habit of spitting on the balls.
Good luck!

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Author: slackmac 
Timestamp:- 28/1/2004 8:14:58 AM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Oli - my real sledge finally appeared but it had lost its bite by then. So try this one - does your husband follow racing too?   
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Author: OliverFan 
Timestamp:- 28/1/2004 10:26:22 AM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
I am a bit worried about you macca, You are always talking about homosexuality are you trying to express yourself in some way. Would you like me to open a thread called THE CLOSET so you can come out of it.

OLI

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Author: slackmac 
Timestamp:- 28/1/2004 1:22:24 PM
Subject: Re: Open Media Conference - round 1

Message:
Oli

You're the one with the picture of a fit, lithe, athletic young man on your avatar

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